Can You Really be Friends with an Ex?

22 Oct

That is my poll for the day. I have been able to stay friends with ex’s in the past – at least for a little while. Go out for dinner and drinks and then go home to our respective homes alone. I can be friendly with them on Facebook. Talk a lot of smack during football season.

Why do I ask? Slovak Boy pushed me to stay friends.  Made a big point of saying he wanted to stay friends. But when it came down to it – I made the effort, he did not.

So I ask again – can you truly keep a long standing friendship with an ex?

*Update as of 9 PM EST, 10/22: Slovak Boy actually emailed me this evening. With a good excuse for being MIA.  Question still stands though – can you we be friends?

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2 Responses to “Can You Really be Friends with an Ex?”

  1. Snark B October 23, 2009 at 11:56 am #

    I’m friends with several of my exes, but in every case there was a “cooling off” period where we avoided each other. Usually a few years. Then we got back into contact as friends.

    It’s funny about SB pushing you to stay friends. I had a GF once who got really offended when I told her that we probably wouldn’t be able to remain friends if we broke up. (At least initially.) Ironically, after we broke up, she said, “You were right. I don’t want to be friends.” Today we are, though.

    • Mel October 23, 2009 at 3:37 pm #

      It is kind of funny. I mean, with the two or three I am still friendly with, that aspect took some time to evolve. There was some cooling off time. I never, ever had one say “I want to stay friends – and I mean it. Some people can’t handle it, but I want to stay friends. Can you?” So I’m paraphrasing, but it was a major part of the convo. We’ll see. When I had a break today in between meetings, I was able to write him back (and not just a quick one liner.) I’ll keep ya posted on how this one plays out.

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