We Are Family

24 Mar

Editor’s Note: This is one of my most random posts I’ve ever written and I think I compiled several ideas into one. I think it makes sense – but go with the flow.  That’s the theme for today.

This is a conversation I had with a family member last night:

Cuz: So are you still boy-crazy?
Me: Nope! I haven’t dated anyone in three weeks.

Why did I feel the need to write this little snippet of our conversation? Because I think it was damn funny.  And it epitomizes my dating life.  Or at least peoples’ outlook on my dating life.

And I have to say, it isn’t completely far off from the truth.

I’ve joked around that I am an equal opportunity dater. And I think that is a good thing. As we reach a certain point in our lives, we finally know what we want and what we expect for in our future.  I don’t necessarily see me dating a man – or several men at any given time – a bad thing. But I also realized I like being chased a little. Is that so horrible? I was reading the following on eFlirtExpert and thought some of the comments about men pursuing women were dead on. But I also think some can apply to us ladies as well.

  • Women should be proactive, BUT guys have to be the hunters.
  • You need to date broadly.  Now women: I think this holds true for us as well.  I think we need to know what we want, but (when online dating) pictures and a quick intro on a profile can be tough when judging a person and their character.
  • Don’t keep score. It kind of goes along with the obsession comment I made yesterday. If you keep score, you’re constantly thinking about it –hence obsessing and letting it take over your life.  Dating – online or whatever – should be fun.  Don’t keep score on how many winks, emails, and responses you have received. Just go with the flow and have fun!

I guess what it boils down to is the following: we should try and steer our own destiny, but we shouldn’t obsess over finding the right one by letting it take over our lives. We need to enjoy the ride and have fun with life as it unfolds.


8 Responses to “We Are Family”

  1. jolene1079 March 24, 2010 at 4:24 pm #

    Love the new blog format! And cheers to the last line of this one – totally agree!!

    • Mel March 24, 2010 at 5:07 pm #

      Thanks friend. On all counts.

  2. Snark B March 25, 2010 at 10:07 am #

    The problem with wanting to be chased is that it’s going to weed out the guys who are shy or nice, and then you’re just left with the pushy ones. A few posts ago you complained about the boorish “yo, girlie!” guys, but those are the types of guys you’re going to get if you always expect men to chase you.

    The nice guys are simply going to give up once you play hard to get, because they will assume you’re not interested.

    • Mel March 26, 2010 at 9:46 am #

      I know I know – but I’m looking for a balance. I think. All I know, it’s tough out there!

      • Snark B March 26, 2010 at 2:20 pm #

        Yes, balance is good. You don’t want to be doing all the chasing, either. (I don’t recommend telling all the cute boys, “yo, sweetcheeks!”)

        I know it’s tough. I’ve been there, and from the guy’s perspective, I hate having to be pushy to get attention. Everyone has different rules and it’s so hard coordinating and translating between them. But you’ll find someone, and then you’ll have a whole new list of things to worry about! 🙂

      • Mel March 26, 2010 at 3:12 pm #

        You know I always love reading/hearing your perspective. I appreciate it – thank you.

        And when I meet someone, I bet I will have a whole new list of things to worry about – and will expect your insight at that point as well. Got it, sweetcheeks?

  3. Meg March 26, 2010 at 9:16 am #

    Love the new blog design and your cousin!

    • Mel March 26, 2010 at 9:47 am #

      HA! Thanks Meg – you can picture the two of us having this convo, right? It’s more comical when you actually picture the players. 🙂

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